Thursday, July 24, 2014

Quote of the day: Boehner wins the choots-pah award

Listen, I, I’d like to act. We’ve got a humanitarian crisis on the border, and that has to be dealt with. But the president clearly isn’t going to deal with it on his own, even though he has the authority to deal with it on his own.
~ John Boehner, on 7/23, in response to a reporter's question on why Congress hasn't acted on the border "crisis"


BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!! All the laughs!

Look, Mr. Boehner, you can't have it both ways.

You happen to be taking the President to court because he acted on his "authority to deal with [shit you won't] on his own". Did you forget that fact?

I don't think you have. You have completely set up the President for a damned if you do, damned if you don't scenario that is totally perpetuated by the media, who is afraid to report facts. Like the President is within his authority to use executive powers. Or that Congress can't (or won't) do shit for the country because (whispers) the President is black, and how on earth can we let (whispers) the black dude, have any sort of positive record? Why, it would mean that the entire stereotype of the lazy, violent, do-nothing, live off the state black male that you've spent centuries perpetuating might be a false narrative. And then we might elect another black dude one day! Why, my delicate sensibilities!  *faints dead away*

The truth is this. President Obama has asked for funding to help control the "situation" on the border - which Bee Tee Dubs is not a "situation" requiring little children to be shot on sight, sent to jail, yelled at, mocked with misspelled signs, or any other such Christian American Way nonsense as your peeps have perpetuated in the name of Jeebus our holy rolling over in his grave lord. (wait - does Jesus have a grave to roll over in if he got up out of it? Just askin. Jew here.) You have refused to give up that funding. Because "humanitarian crisis" and all.

If the President were to act unilaterally (like, "on his own" and all), you would get to call him out and criticize whatever he does. Without having to commit to anything at all during an election year. Because then you might get called out by some other compassionate conservative for actually doing your job and helping people and then lose the election. Because helping people? Blasphemy!!! Personal Responsibility!!! (TM Paul Ryan)

But to actually out loud in public for realz say you aren't going to do your job because the President isn't "overstepping his authority" to "deal with it on his own"?

That takes choots-pah... errrr.... chutzpah. (because again: Jew here.)

And for that, you win the You've Got Balls award today.

Friday, July 18, 2014

Here's the thing about Israel, and the quote of the day

"If the Arabs were to lay down their guns tomorrow, there would be no war. If Israel were to lay down theirs, there would be no Israel."
~ Golda Meir

So Israel is at war once again.

Once again, this teeny tiny nation in a huge sea of nations is defending her right to exist.

Make no mistake. That is exactly what this war is about. It's not about territorial issues in Gaza. If it was, then Hamas would have accepted Israel's offers in the past to give territory back. It's not about statehood. If it was, Hamas would have accepted Israel's past offer of statehood.

No, this war is about Israel either existing or being wiped off the face of the earth.

I read a post over at The Moderate Voice this morning that reminded me of this very fact, even though I really needed no reminders. It was about the movie Conspiracy, which outlines how the Nazi leadership sat around a table and plotted out the Final Solution.
The persecution and mass killing of Jewish people sounds like an ancient biblical reference – but the problem is that for Jewish folks, the horrors from that dreadful period in the 30’s and 40’s are still alive and well. So as much as I disagree with Israel’s tactics in the current war against Palestine, I absolutely understand why millions of Jews consider the war as a form of self defense. Israel’s neighbours have directly threatened their existence and you don’t have to look far in Arabian politics to find anti-Jewish sentiments.
It's true. We still have many Holocaust survivors telling their stories. People who were held captive in concentration camps, people who fled for their lives, some only to be turned away at the borders of other countries. There are millions and millions of first generation survivors - people whose parents, grandparents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins died because a group wanted to wipe them from the face of the earth.

From the Charter of Hamas:
Israel will rise and will remain erect until Islam eliminates it as it had eliminated its predecessors...

For our struggle against the Jews is extremely wide-ranging and grave, so much so that it will need all the loyal efforts we can wield, to be followed by further steps and reinforced by successive battalions from the multifarious Arab and Islamic world, until the enemies are defeated and Allah's victory prevails.

So, for a people who remember their parents being exterminated in gas chambers, being starved to death, forced to work as slaves in concentration camps, medically experimented on, gunned down for fun, having everything taken from them simply because of their religion and a belief that they are genetically inferior... for those people to stand up and wish to fight against an organization whose stated purpose is to eliminate the Jews? It's a no brainer.

Never again.

But for the world to forget that this is at the heart of this war, and for the world to blame Israel for it. Well, that is simply wrong. It's a willful misinterpretation of history, it's a willful misinterpretation of the reality of the middle east as it is today, and frankly, as it has been throughout history.

So here's the thing about Israel.

This is the map that most people see all the time on their TVs, on networks and news organizations. And looking at it, well, why wouldn't the world think Israel should be willing to compromise and give away that teeny bit of land called the West Bank? Which btw, they won in war after being invaded. (Side note: could you imagine if all countries were expected to give back all the territory taken in war?) Because they already pulled out of the Gaza Strip in 2005. Dragged their people kicking and screaming from their homes and turned over a beautiful beach side area to the Palestinians to self govern. They, in turn, elected Hamas, who since 2007 have turned the Gaza Strip into a terrorist wasteland that Israel constantly gets blamed for. 



But here's the thing. Look at this below. Look at it. This is the reality of the Middle East. That little red dot in the sea of yellow? That is Israel. The yellow? Those are the Muslim countries that surround it.


This is not a fight about borders. It's not a fight about land. Look at that map. Just look at it.

Here is what Israel has given away in the past.


Hamas will not be happy until all of the blue on that map is gone.

They continually turn down offers of statehood, as well as land for peace. From JewishVirtualLibrary.org:
The Palestinians have actually had numerous opportunities to create an independent state, but have repeatedly rejected the offers:

In addition, from 1948 to 1967, Israel did not control the West Bank. The Palestinians could have demanded an independent state from the Jordanians.

The Palestinians have spurned each of these opportunities. A variety of reasons have been given for why the Palestinians have in Abba Eban’s words, “never missed an opportunity to miss an opportunity.” Historian Benny Morris has suggested that the Palestinians have religious, historical, and practical reasons for opposing an agreement with Israel. He says that "Arafat and his generation cannot give up the vision of the greater land of Israel for the Arabs. [This is true because] this is a holy land, Dar al-Islam [the world of Islam]. It was once in the hands of the Muslims, and it is inconceivable [to them] that infidels like us [the Israelis] would receive it."

The Palestinians also believe that time is on their side. "They feel that demographics will defeat the Jews in one hundred or two hundred years, just like the Crusaders." The Palestinians, Morris says, also hope the Arabs will acquire nuclear weapons in the future that will allow them to defeat Israel.

I truly believe that the majority of both the Palestinian and Israeli people want peace. I believe that the majority of them are horrified to see Allah's name being used as an instrument of war and hate, in the same way that I hate to see G-d's name used as an instrument of war and hate. I believe they want to live and work and be with their families, and play in their yards, and pray in their houses of worship in peace. But the hard truth and the bottom line is that the Palestinian people democratically elected a terrorist organization to represent them, and that will never bring about peace because Hamas will never accept Israel's right to exist. And Israel will never lay down her arms and surrender her right to exist.

Until the Palestinians (and Israelis, too) stand up to their governments and yell that they want peace and demand COMPROMISE, peace will never happen. I've spoken before about how compromise has become a dirty word. Never more obvious than in the middle east conflict. As long as the Palestinians elect terrorists, and as long as the Israelis elect uncompromising assholes, discussions can't even begin.

It would be better if the Meir quote I led with substituted Hamas for Palestine. As I noted above, most Palestinians want peace. But the sentiment behind the quote? Spot on.

Do I think that Benjamin Netanyahu is an asshole? Yes.

Do I think he's a self-important blowhard? Yes.

But do I doubt for a minute that right now he is fighting for Israel's right to exist? Not for a minute.

Do I think he will protect Israel with everything he has? Yes.

Do I approve of his message? Not always (in fact, almost never).

But do I approve of his mission? Abso-fricken-lutely.



"If the Palestinians were to lay down their guns tomorrow, there would be no war. If Israel were to lay down theirs, there would be no Israel."
~ Benjamin Netanyahu (paraphrasing Golda Meir)